tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post7232470369189152167..comments2024-03-06T14:38:23.226-08:00Comments on And then she recovered.......: Home sweet homeRuby Tuesdayhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comBlogger36125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-6573005528123504542013-03-16T06:20:24.780-07:002013-03-16T06:20:24.780-07:00Thanks Destiny xThanks Destiny xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-62100713873942914262013-03-16T06:20:09.678-07:002013-03-16T06:20:09.678-07:00I appreciate your honesty Peri, I really do
I need...I appreciate your honesty Peri, I really do<br />I need to hear the truth and most people are afraid to tell me straight<br />I just wish I cared more about my health<br />I'm complacent and indifferent and I don't know why<br />I'm worried that I'm not worried if that makes sense<br /><br />Thank you so much for your continued support<br />You have been an angel, truly you have<br /><br />All my love to you dearest xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-35370686426439013512013-03-16T06:17:03.482-07:002013-03-16T06:17:03.482-07:00I'm really trying Tatyana
When I see Mary next...I'm really trying Tatyana<br />When I see Mary next week we will have to put a plan in to place xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-7930811361664182842013-03-16T06:16:20.169-07:002013-03-16T06:16:20.169-07:00I hope so Alie
Hope you're doing ok xI hope so Alie<br /><br />Hope you're doing ok xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-84942143522631220542013-03-16T06:15:42.244-07:002013-03-16T06:15:42.244-07:00Thank you so much Josie
I'm going to check it ...Thank you so much Josie<br />I'm going to check it out right now xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-84059417639040588152013-03-16T03:48:59.056-07:002013-03-16T03:48:59.056-07:00Sounds so awful! Hope you're feeling better no...Sounds so awful! Hope you're feeling better now. Take care of yourself beautiful xxxJesshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16656471149407192267noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-2649497656779005962013-03-16T01:19:23.700-07:002013-03-16T01:19:23.700-07:00Oh fuck. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh FUCK. I'm ...Oh fuck. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck oh FUCK. I'm so glad you're atill alive. I guess the Moa-sized ED Chickens are coming home to roost now :( There is no such thing as getting away with this. Denial is Ed's way of making you complicit in your own murder.<br /><br />I don't want to lose you too. Minaralou went missing a few years back and I've resigned myself to the fact that my lovely friend most likely died with her face in a toilet full of her own puke. I really, really don't want you to die like that either.<br /><br />In a decade tops your parents will be gone, but I'll probably still be here to talk to. (Oh holy fuck don't ask me to think that far ahead please. I hate thinking more than a month ahead, it is unpleasantly like torture)<br /><br />Lol, you fat? Anorexia and Bulimia have fucked your eye/brain/reality connections there, love. You look like hell. A lot more alive than I expected, but you still look like you've been dragged through Namibia backwards.<br /><br />You CAN turn this around. Fight for YOURSELF. Please. You're worth more than a death of eroded insides or aspirated vomit.<br /><br />Love you so so so much. I'm sorry if this sounded all nasty, but I love you and I don't like to lie to people. (The more I like people the more honest I am with them) Fuuuuuuuuuuck I want to hug you right now. You are MORE than the labels of a sick person.<br /><br />*Hugs you so tightly your ribs crack*Peridot (G+P)https://www.blogger.com/profile/07055351645100012755noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-39563080433478387072013-03-15T22:47:39.930-07:002013-03-15T22:47:39.930-07:00A desire chip is earned when you desire to change....A desire chip is earned when you desire to change. It would hopefully lead to a 24 hour chip and so on,however, even if it doesn't it reminds you that you do have the desire. <br />Since I couldn't paste a pic here in comments check my blog I made a post for you.josie13https://www.blogger.com/profile/03988386743210558148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-28452735001286383482013-03-15T20:08:44.833-07:002013-03-15T20:08:44.833-07:00Be careful darling, you're right that it's...Be careful darling, you're right that it's anorexia and bulimia that did this to you, nothing else. I think it's actually quite normal not to fear dying but you know, you shouldn't search it either. Scary, but I'm glad you're ok and back here. Please get the purging under control because you're too amazing to be lost to something like this. <br /><3Tatyanahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11596024097630792471noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-2872824152704157422013-03-15T17:46:06.840-07:002013-03-15T17:46:06.840-07:00Scary stuff! I'm glad you're doing better ...Scary stuff! I'm glad you're doing better now, but do take care. I know it's really hard to stop behaviors even when they lead to such scary and life-threatening consequences, but it's so so important. I hope you (and Mary) are able to start working through this and get you going on the road to recovery. It's not too late, you can do it!Aliehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10715046132281175549noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-40450218917473474732013-03-15T12:25:30.667-07:002013-03-15T12:25:30.667-07:00Sometimes I feel like I'm living a movie Vanes...Sometimes I feel like I'm living a movie Vanessa<br />There's constant drama in my life<br />Yes I do believe I am fat<br />Or at least not thin<br />Part of me knows that's ridiculous but the other part truly believes it<br /><br />Take care of you too xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-83467002063418132252013-03-15T12:23:27.889-07:002013-03-15T12:23:27.889-07:00I'm seriously considering treatment again Emil...I'm seriously considering treatment again Emily<br />The last week has highlighted a light for me<br />My health is not great<br />My relationships are suffering<br />I'm still not able to stop purging despite the pancreatitis<br />I have to do something xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-78166620833633016292013-03-15T12:21:55.227-07:002013-03-15T12:21:55.227-07:00Thanks Sofia xThanks Sofia xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-49674019728779572282013-03-15T11:13:22.260-07:002013-03-15T11:13:22.260-07:00Wow. Amazing story. You have been through so muc...Wow. Amazing story. You have been through so much trauma! I can't believe you look at yourself and think you are fat. It's amazing what lies the brain can tell us. My brain sometimes tells me I am the next Jesus Christ and I need to kill myself to create world peace. Sometimes it asks me to kill other people. The brain is such a fragile being. Care for it, love it and please take care of yourself. You are too precious.Vanessa Higginshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06147840385968556263noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-84237533562870196762013-03-15T08:54:11.290-07:002013-03-15T08:54:11.290-07:00Holy crap Ruby, I hope you're okay.
This soun...Holy crap Ruby, I hope you're okay. <br />This sounds horrible and I can't imagine going through this. I'm proud you managed :/<br />Are you going to try treatment again? If purging is going to make your condition worse then you have to find a way to stop it. And it won't happen on your own. <br />I hope you feel better! Emily Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11825753991702537079noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-40294420961508269562013-03-15T08:16:26.176-07:002013-03-15T08:16:26.176-07:00im glad you arent in as much pain anymore and are ...im glad you arent in as much pain anymore and are out of hospital. good luck starting to be healthier. you deserve it, dear. it isnt too late.<br /><br />stay lovely. <3sofiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08794462112582043372noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-18975483952740098562013-03-15T01:40:15.082-07:002013-03-15T01:40:15.082-07:00I've never heard of the desire chip, what is i...I've never heard of the desire chip, what is it?<br />Maybe AA do have it, I went more to NA<br />Is it like those 90 days and 1 year chips?<br />I've seen those<br /><br />Yes, it does seem recovery has broken in<br />It's about time I do something<br />I'm working hard not to purge so that's a start of sorts<br /><br />Thanks Josie for your coninued support xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-47013426944608611382013-03-15T01:37:03.706-07:002013-03-15T01:37:03.706-07:00Thanks Alice
I won't give up just yet xThanks Alice<br />I won't give up just yet xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-22714848996329174542013-03-15T01:36:24.980-07:002013-03-15T01:36:24.980-07:00Thank you Melrose, I'm trying
Love to you too...Thank you Melrose, I'm trying<br /><br />Love to you too dear xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-86442471495445405382013-03-15T01:35:49.386-07:002013-03-15T01:35:49.386-07:00It's the same for me Krystal
I do define mysel...It's the same for me Krystal<br />I do define myself by my eating disorder as sad as that is<br />The thing is that I know what I need to do, I'm just so afraid to do it<br />My friends are still there, they are probably waiting for me to reach out to them<br />I know doing these things will be hard and uncomfortable at first but as you say I will probably end up enjoying myself despite myself<br /><br />Thank you for sharing Krystal<br />I appreciate it xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-71547110288624242012013-03-15T01:35:29.172-07:002013-03-15T01:35:29.172-07:00Its never too late unless you are dead.
It is blun...Its never too late unless you are dead.<br />It is blunt but true.<br />I am sorry you had to go through all of this but everthing happens for a reason right? Recovery has been knocking at your door for awhile now, you didn't answer the door so it seems it broke in. I remember you wrote about your addiction and said you told yourself you would try recovery for 6 months. Just think 6 months from now what your life could be like. Its up to you; all the hard work is stuff only you can do, and it will suck, but it will be so worth it because you are worth it. <br /><br />Are youb ready for the desire chip? Because I would love to give you it. (I am guesing AA does that by <br />you too otherwise that will make no sense.)josie13https://www.blogger.com/profile/03988386743210558148noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-70276605962106296842013-03-14T20:49:56.742-07:002013-03-14T20:49:56.742-07:00I'm glad you're okay Ruby, it's not to...I'm glad you're okay Ruby, it's not too late for you, don't give up! <br />Alice xxAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-25491592362695855172013-03-14T19:29:43.038-07:002013-03-14T19:29:43.038-07:00Oh Ruby, I'm glad you're home safe and sou...Oh Ruby, I'm glad you're home safe and sound. Please do take care and keep yourself well <3<br />There's always hope my dear, always time for healing. All my love to you, sending you strength and hug.<br />Love you xxhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08982890329998806111noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-85935701056078403072013-03-14T17:04:57.373-07:002013-03-14T17:04:57.373-07:00It is not unusual to isolate oneself from friends ...It is not unusual to isolate oneself from friends or even family when we have an eating disorder - I did that also- and then after OCD hit me I started to isolate with that too. I am starting to realize that it is good for me to be with people for many reasons. But I had to force myself to be social because i knew I needed it. Then once I am around people I laugh a lot which is good medicine. I hope you will do that Ruby. And don't ever think it is too late, it isn't. As I read your post I understand so much of what you say..like when you wrote that even when you were sick, when you put your jeans on & they were loose and it made you feel good. I get that. But that is the illness talking and I know I felt that way because it was my measure of control and my weight and thinness was my identity. I am not saying it is the same for you, it may not be at all but I just wanted to share with you that I got better by defining my success in a new way. Instead of claiming fame by being the thin one, I worked to be the best at something else, healthier. And it worked for a number of years, until Old Man OCD had to come along. I have managed to push him back into something more like an inconvenience now but it seems I will battle something or another for the rest of my life. But it is always worth fighting for. Do fight Ruby.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16288842067954888301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6562281218287648674.post-51647121479468919052013-03-14T12:47:19.134-07:002013-03-14T12:47:19.134-07:00I've been reading about it too today and it re...I've been reading about it too today and it really makes for scary reading<br />It's actually quite serious and that's only sinking in today<br />I hope my doctors change my meds soon as they are probably what's causing it<br />I've been left on my meds for far too long and now instead of helping me they are killing me<br />It is a wake up call<br />It's a warning that things aren't right inside<br />It's up to me to do something about it and make the change<br />It won't be easy but I have to do it<br /><br />Thanks sweetie xRuby Tuesdayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15078080281794429051noreply@blogger.com