And how sweet it is
I am in my onsie
A cup of Barry's tea in my hand
And Honey and Lea at my feet
All is well with the world again
One thing that I do like about travelling
Is the airport
I know a lot of people hate that part
But being a people watcher
I love it
We arrived at Stansted airport at about 12pm
My Aunt and Uncle dropped us off
And we set about braving the queues to check in
I was fascinated watching the people ahead of us
Two girls
I would say in their twenties
One was wearing a very short white dress
With highest shoes that I have seen in a long time
They must have been 6-7 inches high
The other girl in a similar sort of dress
But she had opted for the more practical platform high-rise shoe
I just do not understand this
Why would anyone in their right mind wear something like this to the airport?
I felt like a right tinker compared to them
In my practical navy trousers and Roxy high-tops
But seriously people
They looked like they had just come from an all night club at best
And at worst
Well....
I won't say
So I was very amused watching them teeter around on their heels
They weighed their bags at the check in desk
And they were both over weight
So they had to take their enormous bags
No doubt filled with hair spray and glitter
And had to re-distribute their belongings
This was quite comical to watch
As they could barely balance on their sky-scraper shoes
Why would you bother getting so dressed up to go to the airport?
Seriously?
I was going to try and take a sneaky photo of her shoes to show you
But I thought not as if she had seen me she could have used her shoe as a weapon to gouge my eyes out or something similar
We sat in the terminal for another hour
My mother reading
And me people watching
I looked at skinny girls and wondered if they appreciated their skinnny-ness
I know when I was skinny
I took it for granted
It's only now that I am chunkier that I miss being a little person
I looked at girls with long, lean and tanned limbs
And wondered what it is like to be beautiful
It must be rather nice knowing that you look good all the time
That you can throw any item of clothing on and you will look cool and put together
I stopped people watching then
As it was becoming depressing
We were getting the little train to our gate
And my mother asked a rather cute looking guy if we were on the right train
'I hope so' he replied in a broad Irish accent
'If not we can be lost together'
I gave him the once over
Well dressed
Slim
Attractive face
Good hair
He was on our flight
And as we lined up to board
He was a few people behind me
I glanced back every now and then
He was engrossed on his phone
I had a newspaper so I decided to take it out and read it and try to look like someone interested in the world and current affairs
Maybe he might see me and think 'Now there's a girl I'd like to get to know'
I tried to look cool
I tried to act like a normal person
But in actual fact what happened was
I managed to mess up the paper as I was reading it
You know the way the pages all get stuck
And it ended it up all over the place
On the floor
Caught in my bag
Ay ay ay!
I didn't see him after that
Which is a pity as I think that I love him
So we finally boarded our flight
And settled in to our seats
The plane took off
I read my book
And my mother read hers
Then the air stewarts came around with a menu offering an 'amazing' array of food
I had a quick look but had no intention of buying anything
I like to know what I could have
Even if I don't have it
It baffles me why anyone would choose to have lunch on a budget airline
And actually have to pay for it
There was a woman sitting in front of me with her daughter
They ordered a panini and chips
And my God
When it came it was the strangest looking panini I have ever seen
It looked like cardboard
No really it diid
And the chips?
I mean God knows what shit they put in those things
Anyway
The flight was uneventful
And we landed with a bump in Knock
So this post has turned in to a bit of a rant
But that's ok
And I apologise profusely that there are no photos with this post yet again
But I will sort them out tonight
And get them to you in the morning
In other news
I am still of the cigarettes
One week today
Go me!!
But I would be lying if I said that I wasn't dying for one
I walked out of the airport
And reached for my packet of smokes
Then I remembered that I am now in fact a non smoker
I walked past the other smokers and inhaled deeply
God I miss them
But I will plough on
I have so much to catch up on.........
Glad you're back home and relaxed. : )
ReplyDelete& I agree-who would wear those outfits and shoes to the airport? I want to be comfortable on a flight!
<3
Thanks Kay
DeleteI am so glad to be home
Going to curl up on the couch now
And yes!
Why the shoes and the dresses at airports?
I just don't get it!
Hope you are well? x
Welcome home! I'm sorry I never got back to you about possibly meeting up in London, I disappeared down one of those annoying little black holes. Anyways, I just wanted to say a massive woohoo re smoking! Like recovery from anything, I'm always less bothered about the reasons initially that get you on the path that's healthy, so long as they get you on the path. So if it's for financial gains, that's a fantastic reason and perhaps everytime you reach for one, put a pound (or euro!) in a pot. And then depending on how quickly you need rewarding, either buy yourself something at the end of each day or each week...or month as you get more accustomed to it. It's quite scary seeing how much money quite literally used to go up in smoke! And as with any kind of ed recovery, blips will happen but that too is ok. Have one blip, accept it as such and then move on and put the pound in the pot next time cxx ps I hope this doesn't sound really contrite and patronising. This is why I should never comment!!
ReplyDeleteThanks C
DeleteAnd don't worry about not meeting up
I know our kind can go under and that is ok
I will be in London again and maybe we can meet up another time
Yes, I guess it doesn't really matter why I gave up smoking
The fact that I gave up is enough
To be honest with you, one of the things that is stopping me smoking is the fact that I'd have to tell people if I did smoke
And I just can't bear disappointing people
And your comment is neither contrite or patronising
I love your comments
You talk/write a lot of sense c
Good to hear from you
I hope you have managed to climb out of that black hole
I'm here to give you a hand if you need it? x
Welcome Home ..... :-)
ReplyDeleteYou write this: looked at skinny girls and wondered if they appreciated their skinnny-ness
I know when I was skinny
I took it for granted
It's only now that I am chunkier that I miss being a little person
I looked at girls with long, lean and tanned limbs
And wondered what it is like to be beautiful
But, there might also be a problem with your body image, right? Cause your still not chunky, that's just your head telling you. And also, a few months ago, when you were even more underweight, you never felt so tiny and skinny. You still wrote you would feel fat and so on...
That's the stupid thing about ED, it never lets us feel the right size or pretty or what not. Just 'too big for the world'.
We should really learn to take care of the body we have, no matter what size, and be ever so grateful that it does what it does. That's really hard, and it's a learning proces, but we should still try....
Because I, for one, think you're pretty and skinny and beautiful. But I mostly think that, because you're a beautiful person in your writing. because your words give you power and a certain strength and lovelyness that you just have.
I hope you can rest, now you're at home again and you can take some vegetables! Just cause they're jummy ;-)
(L)
Thanks A
DeleteIt 's so good to be home
Yes, you make a good point
Even at my most skinny
I never felt it
That's the cruel thing about this illness
We never get to enjoy the thing we crave the most
Because we never believe that we are thin enough
No matter what weight I am
I always feel too big
Although I bought I new pair of jeans at the airport yesterday
And I actually think that they look pretty nice
I don't know
It's a daily battle
Thank you for your kind words
I hope you're doing ok? x
That's an interesting way to dress for flying... I think your trousers and high-tops are much more travel-appropriate. Surely security would be paranoid about those shoes?! I do wish I could wear heels that high though.
ReplyDeleteI agree with TheWriterNamedA: even when you were thinner, from what you've written, you still felt 'chunky' or 'fat'. I know it's confronting to think maybe your perception still isn't 100% accurate, but I think A has a really good point.
Aww, isn't that always the way with the cuties? Who knows, maybe you'll run into him again one day and it'll be the start of a grand romance ;)
Anyway, I'm glad you're back to the comfort of home. I'm so, so proud of you for giving up the cigs. Keep it up!
Lots of love <3 xx
I know right?
DeleteThose heels could be considered as a weapon!
Bella I feel I need to apologise to you
I have not been reading your blog
Because I find it too upsetting to witness your demise
I don't mean that in a cruel
I just care about you and hate to see you suffer so much
I've been meaning to email you
And I will get around to that
You are special to me as we started blogging at the same time
And we have followed each others stories from the start
Just know that I love you dearly
I truly do x
haha this was hilarious. I also judge people who wear heels in inappropriate settings, such as a college campus. Like, are you seriously going to trek around to all your classes in stilettos?? And as for your love interest - I've been there. There was once a guy on the subway who caught my eye, but I tried to play it cool and drink out of my new travel mug while reading the news on my phone...but ended up spilling coffee down the front of my (white) shirt. Surprise surprise, the relationship did not work out.
ReplyDelete