Work induction

I'm just back from my first day of work induction

Myself and another girl were there to meet the manager

And to go through what we will be doing 

And our hours 

Luckily 

Most of my hours are at the weekend 

With one short evening shift on a Wednesday

So really and truly it doesn't interfere with my other activities 

I will still get to horse riding Wednesday morning

To my meetings 

And appointments 

Which is great

I'll be working about 22 hours a week

Which means my disability will be effected slightly 

But that's ok

I will get to keep the majority of it

I actually found out this week

That I can only earn €120 or less each week without my disability being effected

So that's less than ten hours a week

Which wouldn't be worth my while

Or my employers 

So any hours over that ten

My disability will be cut on a sliding scale 

But 

I think it will all work out fine

I'm going to do the 22 hours

I think it will be good for me 

We were given so much information today

It was mind boggling 

The other girl there was a lot younger than me 

Early twenties I'd say

But we had a little chat

And she seems lovely 

Georgina is the manager 

And she is very firm but fair 

I like her a lot 

There is no nonsense about her 

She gave us a lot of possible scenarios that could possibly happen 

Basically 

The holiday centre is a non profit centre for those who ordinarily couldn't afford a holiday 

It is run by a charity called St. Vincent de Paul

They also run a thrift shop

And an elderly care home 

I did the interview for the job back in February

And it has been a long process to get this far

But I am super excited to start working 

Georgina emphasised that the three things key to the centre

Are friendliness, cleanliness and good food 

She really gave us a great introduction to working there 

I'm back in on Thursday to meet the rest of the staff

We finished up at lunch time

And I seized the opportunity to have a quick chat with Georgina 

She needed my bank details and things 

And while we were doing some paperwork

She asked me if I thought it would be too much for me 

As I had explained to her the last time we met about my ED

And how I am in recovery 

I was honest with her

At first 

I felt a little out of my depth

This is my first proper job in quite a while 

And I told her it was a confidence thing with me more than anything else

Georgina assured me that she had every confidence and faith in me

And said I would be like a new woman by the end of the three months working 

It was nice to hear that she believes in me

I just wish I had the same belief in myself 

But I guess that will come in time

I really think this job could be a life changer for me 

If I can just face my fears and anxieties 

Turn up 

And give it my best 

I start officially June 3rd

So I have just over a week to get myself prepared 

I know I'm going to be nervous

Starting a new job is tough for anyone 

And throw in a few mental health issues

And an addiction to drugs

It could all go very wrong

But I'm choosing to be positive 

And to go in with a clear and level and open mind 

I know the first few shifts will be bumpy 

As I get used to their way of doing things 

But I know if I can just hang in there

It could be the making of me 

It could give me back my confidence 

That I so desperately miss

It could help me see that I am capable and able to work

It could even be a stepping stone on to more work 

I'm a hard worker 

And I love to be busy 

Love to be on the go all the time 

And this job will most definitely be busy 

Which will suit me down to the ground 

Because of the nature of the work

I will be dealing with vulnerable people 

People with mental health issues

Addiction

For some people 

This will be their first holiday

People who might not be used to a structured environment 

Who don't eat three square meals a day 

We are situated on the towns main road 

So anyone can wander in

And it will be up to me to deal with these people 

I hope given the fact that I have experienced a lot in my life

Will help me to be empathetic 

And understanding 

But at the same time

I can't let myself be taken advantage of

Because I think I can be seen as a soft touch sometimes 

I was interested in listening to Georgina today 

As she is so friendly and warm

But at the same time 

I know she takes no shit from anyone

I would love to be like that 

And hopefully this job will help me find my own voice

My own inner confidence 

And self esteem 

Despite my anxiety though

I am going to do this 

I am going to go in with a positive mind set 

Anything I don't know 

I can ask 

And I think throwing myself in at the deep end is good for me

As then I have to figure things out

But you guys 

This is a huge deal for me 

My job will even be put through the books!

Something that hasn't happened to me in a long time 

My last two jobs were cash in hand 

But now I'm going to be a proper Bona fide employee!

How exciting is that?

I'm just so happy that I'm going to be able to fit in everything around my job

It's so very important to me

To be able to go horse riding 

To see my doctor 

And Breda 

And Mary

It's going to be a busy summer 

That's for sure 

But you know what?

This is it

This is me living my life 

Feeling the fear and doing it anyway

This is making huge progress with my independence 

And that is just wonderful for me 

Finally 

Things are all coming together for me

And I feel alive!

Please say a wee prayer for me this week

I know all you ladies are behind me

And I appreciate that so much

Thank you

You are amazing!