Wednesday

I am feeling pretty bruised today

After yesterday

Failing my driving test

And then being attacked on my own blog

By 'anonymous' of course

Because these people don't have the courage of their convictions

To comment under their real name

I'm not getting in to the whole thing again today

I explained myself yesterday

Even though I am under no obligation to

I know that I am not doing anything wrong

But yes I have made mistakes 

I am not perfect 

Far from it

I make mistakes every single day

That's life 

That's reality 

This is the thing about writing a blog

And putting yourself out there 

You are open to insult and ridicule 

I know a lot of you disable anonymous comments 

I haven't done this 

And I don't plan to

But it means that anyone can say/write anything to you and about you

99% of the feedback I get here on my blog is positive 

I really get very little negative feedback

But it's ok

Of course we are not all going to agree all the time

It was just the way this anonymous comment was worded

Was really nasty and scathing 

I don't know if this person is a regular reader

Or someone who just stumbled across my blog

It doesn't matter 

But I feel they were having a go at me because they saw an opportunity to bring someone down a peg or two 

And of course 

I am human 

My feelings get hurt 

I think it's pretty low to kick someone while they are down 

When they are vulnerable 

They could have made their point a little more delicately I think

Of course

I am not a special little snowflake

I am a big girl 

And I can take a bit of criticism 

It's just that I felt this was an attack 

More than someone offering some constructive criticism 

Look

I am doing my best

Putting my life back together after suffering with many chronic conditions

I do my best to do the right thing

To be a good person 

Not to hurt myself or anyone else 

I ask for help everyday 

To be the best person I can be

The past year has been really tough

As I try and put back together the pieces of my life 

I know I'm not doing everything perfectly

Who is?

I am trying to do the next right thing 

In every area of my life

I don't know if my anonymous commenter will read this 

But if you are 

I would ask you to think before you write/speak

You could have made your point in a very different way 

Instead 

You instigated an argument 

And I didn't know how you felt after it

But I felt pretty rotten

I would even go one step further

And invite you to email me 

To clear things up

As I hate the way they've been left

But maybe you don't even care 

Maybe you've already forgotten and moved on

I on the other hand 

Am probably too sensitive

And let things like this get to me

I'm just trying to live my life the best way I know how

I am not doing anything to provoke or hurt anyone else 

I am not a bad person 

At least I don't think I am

I really felt attacked yesterday 

And felt like this person questioned me and my whole life

I just want to live my life 

Be a good person 

Do the right thing 

And lay my head down at night

Knowing that today

I did my very best 

Everyone makes mistakes 

It's human nature 

But those mistakes shouldn't be used against us

Again and again

We should be allowed to make the mistake 

Learn

And move on

We can't be tried for our mistakes over and over again

That's just not fair or right

As regards my driving test

Al least now I know what I need to work on

And I know what to expect 

I will take the time to revise and learn and practise everything I need to

And apply to do it again soon

To those of you who left lovely comments  and texts 

Thank you 

As ever 

You are there for me

And I am eternally grateful