Friday 6 March 2015

What a week......

Its been a tough week to say the least
I lost a friend 
And I'm still reeling
I'm not quite sure why it happened
But she chose to walk away 
And I guess that is her perogative
Still
It was quite the nasty break up
I think she said some things she didn't mean
I know I did
In the heat of the moment
We both came out bruised and battered
Nasty business
And I am left wondering if I am what this person said I am
A Fake
Uncaring
People pleaser

Then on Tuesday my neighbour died
I think I have mentioned my neighbours before
They are an elderly couple
She is a tough as old boots
Salt of the earth type
He was a proud Scot
Very shy
But with a heart of gold
Their story is heart breaking really
After his first wife died
The man remarried out neighbour
They met in AA
And both were recovering from their respective addictions
They married
And moved here some 20 years ago
They were always great neighbours
They would watch the house if we were away
Or mind my dogs from time to time

But more recently there has been some trouble in their house
They both began drinking again
And chaos ensued

Two years ago 
The wife became extremely unwell
And was hospitalised
We went to visit her
She didn't even know her own name
Let alone who we were
And that was caused by drink
We thought that she wouldn't pull through
Because she was so far gone
But she is a fighter
And she bounced back amazingly well 
I have no doubt that she was lucky to have survived

Then one morning
About six weeks ago
The wife asked me to pick up a prescription for her husband
And told me that he was ill
I did what she asked
And later on that day
We saw an ambulance leaving the house
We went over to see what had happened
And it turned out that the husband had had a stroke
He had in fact had the stroke three days prior
But his wife thought that he was drunk
And was slurring his words because he was drunk
So she didn't phone the doctor until a couple of days later
When the doctor arrived
He immediately called an ambulance
He was brought to the local hospital
Where he stayed for the next six weeks
The wife has no family around
And a lot of the mans family seemed to be estranged
So it was up to us 
Her family and friends
To support her
And help 
Jobs like getting her shopping
And bringing the dog for a walk
The husband left his wife with huge debts that he had acquired
Because he was drinking all his money

We got the news that he had died on Tursday night
We sat with his wife that night
And held her as she cried 
It was heart breaking
Even though he was an elderly man
It was still a shock

The removal was last night
And what an appropriate day
It was cold and dark
And we all huddled together trying to stay warm
And this morning was the funeral
A lovely simple service
They did him proud

This really hits home to me the destruction that addiction causes
It tips families apart
It breaks hearts
And causes no end of hurt and pain
If I needed a reminder not to go back down that road 
Then this is surely it

I'm finding that if I stay busy
It's easier not to think about using or The Boy
I need to put that relationship to rest
No good can come of it
There is someone out there for me
Who is good and kind
And most importantly who is stable
Anyway
A relationship is not my priority at the moment 
Getting well is
I know love will happen when I am ready
I know that I am not at the moment

4 comments:

  1. It's very sad and thought-provoking story, poor lady. I hope you're allright.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is so sad K
      She is doing ok though
      And so am I x

      Delete
  2. That's so sad... god. She thought he was just drunk. That's just heartbreaking.

    After just commenting on your last post, you're obviously very torn about The Boy. One day you really want to see him but can't because of your family, the next you know no good can come of it. Have you talked to your new counsellor about him yet?

    <3
    xx

    ReplyDelete
  3. I am so torn Bella
    I don't want to see him
    Yet I find myself thinking about him and say dreaming about him
    Even though I know we would be a disaster together
    Sigh......
    I wish I could just switch my feelings off
    But it's not that simple

    Hope you're doing ok x

    ReplyDelete

Thank you for leaving some love x