Thursday, 19 October 2017

October Update: Part 2

Hello friends
I don't know how many people still read and follow this blog
It still gets a couple of hundred hits a day 
So I'm thinking there are still a few of you
This blog has changed since its birth some five and a half years ago
It was an ED blog
Thenna recovery blog
But now it's more like a life blog 
A living blog
A keep going despite everything blog
A don't give up blog
Life is good for me
And might I add I am the heaviest I've ever been and I couldn't give a hoot
When they need to remove a wall from my home to get me out of the house with a forklift 
Then I will worry
I can't remember if I wrote about what happened a couple of weeks ago at horse riding 
Anyway I'll you 
I was in a lesson with Fintan 
And from the start I didn't feel good 
We were trotting around the arena
And I started to feel very dizzy and weak 
My instructor realised and pulled me off the horse 
I was so disappointed 
I chatted to my instructor afterwards 
And she told me that the way I was going she wouldn't let me ride 
She asked if I was eating properly 
And the answer to that was a big no
She emphisised how important it is to eat correctly while doing such a physical sport
That right there was motivation enough to get me to sort out my food 
It wasn't that I was restricting or binging 
But I wasn't eating breakfast 
Or a solid lunch or dinner
I kind of just grazed through out the day
Picking and not actually eating proper meals
I had to make a very manageable and realistic meal plan
I now eat breakfast, lunch and dinner
And do my best to eat good healthy food
It has made a massive difference 
I'm a different girl
I have energy 
I feel more switched on
More able and capable 
And horse riding has become fun again 
I was there just yesterday 
And my canters went great 
My instructor told me that she can see the work I've put in and that we will be progressing now
I'm hoping this means I'll be jumping 
I can't tell you how excited I am for that!
Watch this space...

In other news 
Coco is well
He saw the farrier a few weeks ago
And was good as gold 
I've started bringing him for walks down the lane on the lead rope 
And he just loves it
He'll walk down no bother
But when I want to go back to the field 
He doesn't want to
And stands like a stubborn toddler
So I try reverse psychology 
And unclipped his lead rope and walk off
He immediately trots behind me
Apart from the day when he trotted past me and went heading up the lane towards the road 
I was freaking out 
But had to remain calm
I called him
He stopped and looked at me 
Then I remembered I had polo mints in my pocket 
I took them out and lured him back to the field with them
It worked thank God!
Relations with Cocos owner are not good
He is moody and unpredictable 
One day he's as nice as can be
Another day he is verbally attacking me
He's sarcastic in a mean way
And I'm starting to wonder if maybe he's not entirely well in the head 
He insists that I buy any tack or equipment that Coco may need 
Because he supplies the grazing 
Em excuse me
But last time I checked 
He is your pony
Yes I help care for him
Yes I am invested in him
But I've already shelled out money for food, for tack, for the farrier 
I won't be taken for a fool
Moving on
Here is the monkey man Coco...


Sunday, 1 October 2017


Don't you just love Autumn?
I think it's my favourite of all the seasons
Today is the first of October
The leaves are falling 
The colours are beautiful
It's cold enough to wrap up in warm jumpers and scarves
Love it all!
September was a month of highs and lows
I finished work
I celebrated my birthday
On the 17th
I travelled three hours away to Westport for a little holiday 
I've been talking about this holiday for quite some time
It's a package where you stay three nights in the hotel
And the manager of the hotel also owns stables so you can do a mountain trek one day
And a beach trek the next day
I brought my parents with me
And treated them
It felt so good to be able to pay for them
And it felt even better to organise my very own holiday 
And do exactly what I want to do
I've gone on holidays in the past 
But they were other people's holidays that I tagged along 
This holiday was all me!

We arrived Sunday afternoon
Checked in 
I handed over the guts of a grand in cash
That I worked hard all summer to save
I actually felt like a proper adult paying that bill
And to treat my parents was just great
We had two rooms 
Myself and Mam in one
And Dad in another
We settled in 
Then headed up for dinner
We actually stayed in this same hotel about ten years ago
At Christmas time
I was strung out at the time 
And didn't brings enough drugs or methadone with me 
And promptly went in to a severe withdrawal 
I'll never forget that night 
I thought I was going to die
Here I am ten years later 
Ten years older and wiser 
A long way away from that girl 
The man who owns the stables 
Texted me to tell me he would pick me up the next morning 
And we would do the mountain trek first 
I woke up the next morning 
Full of excitement and nerves
I forced down a breakfast
Grabbed my hat 
And went to wait for Michael
He soon arrived 
And we headed out to the stables 
First impressions were not good
As Micheal was shouting at all the staff
And there was a very tense atmosphere 
I actually went outside and rang Mam 
I wasn't sure if I even wanted to continue 
As the whole place felt very hostile 
I decided to give it a second shot 
I was shown what horse I was riding 
A massive boy called Pepper 
I mean he was enormous!
I was introduced to my guide Atulla 
Who was from Hungary 
And two others called Zena and Cynthia
Atulla brought me out to the outdoor arena 
And went over the trek etc
I decided I didn't want to canter that day
I said I would wait until the beach trek
A rare moment of restraint for me

We all saddles up and headed out
We were going to the foothills of a mountain called Croagh Patrick 
Which people climb in pilgrimage 
It was quite a long trek at three hours in all
It was just beautiful
The day was lovely 
Weather was great
We did a lot of trotting and walking 
A lot of chatting 
And of course lots of photos
Atulla was quite the character 
And kept us all entertained 
The trek up the mountain was quite precarious at times 
Drops either side
Rocky ground
But I thoroughly enjoyed it
We got back to the stables 
And Atulla gave me a lift back to the hotel
I was so glad that I didn't pull out 
I was so glad persevered
It was well worth it

I got back to the hotel 
Tired but happy 
I had a shower 
Changed my clothes 
And headed down to the harbour with Mam
I was really on a high 
And couldn't contain myself
That evening we had dinner 
And then went for a couple of drinks 
And to listen to the music 
I swear I was the youngest person there by about three decades
I was wrecked 
So went to bed early enough 

The next morning 
I was sore but not too bad 
Today were going to do the beach trek
And there was another lady coming with us
While I waited for Michael to pick me up 
I tried to figure out who she was 
Michael arrived 
And I met the lady called Jo
She was bright and bubbly 
And I liked her immediately 
We headed out to the beach 
Where Atulla was waiting with the horses
Who had been transported from the stables in a big horse box
Jo was riding Pepper today
Today I was riding a little cob called Charlie 
But what he lacked in size 
He made up for in personality 
He was full of character
I hopped up on a rock 
And on to his back
Straight away I could feel how keen he was to get going 
We arranged ourselves in to a line and headed out
Atulla was riding Sylvester
And also riding with us was Inaja
Who was riding Imp
The beach was vast and completely deserted
Again we were lucky with the weather 
From the start 
The craic was mighty
Jo was full of the joys 
And Atulla also kept us all entertained with jokes and taking the piss out of us 
But I must also say
When he needed to be serious
He most definitely was
He had the balance of fun and safety just right
We trotted the length of the beach 
Went through the water 
Up on the dunes 
On the rocks 
Then we came to a sort of circular area of beach 
And Atulla asked us if we wanted to canter
I did 
But Atulla said he would do it with me
So we cantered together around the circle 
Charlie was a total pocket rocket
God bless him he could move
Jo tried too
But it didn't quite work out for her
The weather was starting to turn 
So we began to head back 
We had to wade through the water again 
And the tide has come in
So because Charlie was so small
I was up to my knees in sea water 
Which the rest of them thought was hilarious 
I was soaked and the water was feckin' freezing 
But it was all part of the fun
We made it back to the trailer
Led the horses back in 
Then we all piled in to the cab 
And headed back to the hotel
The trailer was ancient 
But we had the best of fun on the way back 
Chatting about the trek
If it was even possible 
It was better than the mountain trek
Our little holiday was over all too soon
But I thoroughly enjoyed it
And it gave me a fire in my belly to do more and more riding 
I left with precious memories 
And some beautiful photos
Also the knowledge that I made this happen 
It couldn't have gone better 

I have a lot more to write
But I think I will leave it there for today 
And try and post some photos to go with this post...