Monday, 24 February 2014

Obese: A year to save my life

Over the past couple of weeks I've been watching a documentary series called 'Obese: A year to save my life
Each episode follows a different super morbidly obese person as they try to lose weight and turn their lives around
I love to watch documentaries about eating disorders
But I also like to watch ones about people on the other end of the spectrum

In last nights episode we were introduced to Clare
She is 32 and from Liverpool
She is engaged to be married and has a 5 year old son called Nathan
Clare weighed in at 26 and a half stone
Standing at 5'7 that made her super morbidly obese

The show is presented by Jesse Pavelka
Jesse is a personal trainer who has a special interest to super obese people

Being so overweight was having a devastating effect on Clare's life
All the little things that we take for granted, she just couldn't do
She couldn't play with her young son
She struggled to be active
And every little thing, like taking a shower or tying her shoe laces was a huge effort
Clare was miserable
She couldn't stand to look at herself in the mirror and her weight was really getting her down
She confessed that on a bad day she could eat all day
Everything from a greasy fry in the morning
Endless take aways and chocolate bars
She just couldn't stop eating

Enter Jesse
He would be spending the next 10 months with Clare and gave her the goal of losing 10 stone in that time
He worked out a food plan for her
And suggested that she do 3-4 hours of exercise every day
All this on top of the hectic schedule she already had

Clare got off to a great start
And in the first 2 months she lost over 2 stone#
She had likened her love of food to that of an addict
She been sexually abused as a child and she explained that food became a great comfort to her
Jesse wanted her to find hew coping mechanism to deal with negative emotions

Clare worked so hard
She was fighting or her life
Although she did have a few setbacks, by month 10 she had met her target and managed to lose over 10 stone
She was like a different person
Inside and out
Her confidence and has soared
And all fat around her face had shrunk to reveal a very pretty girl
I hope she manages to keep up her good work

I'm interested in these types of shows as I feel like that could easily be me
I think that eating disorders and obesity are all on the same spectrum
When I am feeling down I can either go one of two ways
I can either turn to food or I can turn away from it
It scares me so much to think that that could be me one day
It terrifies me that I could lose control so much that pile on the pounds
I love my food
Yes, shock horror!
Girl with an eating disorder confesses to liking food
I love it so much that I can kind of understand how obese people find themsleves so out of control

A lot of my ED is about control
Although realistically I know that my ED is the one in control
If I am going through a bulimic phase I can eat a serious amount of food
O course it all ends up  in the toilet and I don't put on weight
But sometimes I wonder of I didn't purge would I pile on the piles too?
And that scares the be'Jesus out of  me!

I've always been an all or nothing type of person
There is no middle ground with me
I would love to be a bit more balanced
In all areas of my lie
But I find it very hard to find a happy medium

In my opinion you can become addicted to anything
Including food
Ok it may not have the threat of death or the chaos of alcoholism or drug addiction
But it is every bit as soul destroying
Every bit as damaging
Trust me, I know

Have you see this show?
What did you think?
Do you think that eating disorders and obesity are on the same spectrum?
I'd love to know...........


  1. I need to watch this show..

    I dunno Ruby... I am fat.. I am pretty disordered... I don't know really...

  2. I think that a food disorder is a food disorder whether you are big or small... I have one too... I have been heavy all of my life... I had to do a conversion... thankfully I was never 26 stones but I was definitely too uncomfortable. I have no desire to be skinny... I am still about 35 pounds over what a place like Weight Watchers would say I should be... I am only going down another 15... maybe 20 pounds which means I would still be 15 to 20 pounds over and I am fine with that. Actually if I never lost another pound I am fine with my body... it is shapely and curvy and I love it...

    I think that is the biggest issue with women Ruby, they forget to love their bodies and just be healthy... that is what I am and have been aiming for this past 8 months. My eating was emotional and now I am doing other things instead of eating... is it easy? No but I am loving the results and I love myself enough to want to continue to be as healthy as possible.

    Believe me, I didn't always love myself or my body... but now... it is different and I am grateful for that... especially since my whole life has fallen apart in the last 6 months... I didn't turn back to food. I feel for people who have an eating issue, it isn't easy to change.. it took me 30 years and lots of counseling to make the change and understand that I had to love myself where I was...

    Keep fighting Ruby... never give up, change is more than possible.. when you are ready xox

  3. I agree with Launna. I think no matter if you're extremely tiny or overweight, it's disordered eating. I feel if someone has some issue with food, then they have disordered eating. I've never seen the show but I'd love to check it out. Thanks for sharing Ruby.

  4. I saw that show and I think it's incredibly motivating. You should also watch Supersize vs. superskinny.

  5. Sounds like she had issues with COE as comfort-eating gone bonkers. Poor lady. I'm glad she managed to get her health back! Eating disorders don't discriminate, and size is no indicator of sickness.

    Food is addictive, certain foods more than others. Adaptive neural wiring going out of control with the weirdness we have around glamourising photoshopped sticks and demonising overweight people.

    Lol, according to BMI Michael Jordan is obese. He's still mostly muscle. System is FLAWED!

    I find shows like that to be wonderfully triggering and incredibly problematic in the way they handle the issues they deal with. SSvSS seems to be one of the better ones in pushing for health, but Biggest Loser is so fucking disgusting in the way they treat the competitors and how they make them lose weight that I want it banned. Check out the stats on BL competitors who were psych-healthy before the show and end up with EDs after it >:(

    We prize looks over health and that is killing us.


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