Confused.com

I remember a few months ago

Saying to one of my friends 

That I wished I had some boy drama in my life

And I meant it

Well now I do have some boy drama in my life

And as fun and exciting as it all is

I am thoroughly confused

The last few days have gone something like this

Sunday

I texted the boy

And invited him to call out the next day

As I thought I would have the house to myself

But it turned out that I didn't

So that idea was scratched 

Monday

We arranged to meet on Tuesday

After my counselling appointment

But then he texted that he had to work

So I headed home

And told him he could call out when he was done

Then he texted that he had a flat tyre

And could I go out to him

He the sent directions to his house

But I was feeling sleepy with my meds 

And didn't feel comfortable driving that far

So I was the last one to text

And to him to text me when he could meet up

That was last night

And I haven't heard from him since

I have to say

This is wrecking my head

The constant texting back and forth

The not knowing if he likes me

Or what he really wants

I was so tempted to send him a text asking him straight out if he likes me or what

I'm not sure if this is game playing

I hate game playing

I much rather someone would be honest with me

It saves so much time and energy

And the funny thing is

That I'm not even sure that I like this guy

And yet

I want him to like me

The rational part of me knows it's not a good idea to get involved with this guy

I know it could all end in tears

Every fibre of my being is telling me to stay away from him

Yet I feel strangely drawn to him

Why is that?

Is it because I want what I can't have?

Is it because he is a so called 'bad boy'?

Is it because he is the first guy that has featured in my life since I've started to recover?

I really don't know

As I have said before 

I am so rusty and out of practice as regards dating and matters of heart 

I feel like I teenager again

Trying to figure out if the boy likes me

Trying to figure out if I like him

Or if I like the idea of him

Reading his texts

Trying to read between the lines

Ay ay ay 

So ladies

My lovely ladies

I know some of you are in relationships

Some of you are married

And some of you are single like me 

I need your help

What do I do?

What should my next move be?

Do I text him again?

Or wait for him to get in touch with me?

My feeling is that I should wait for him to make the next move

But I could ge wrong

Damn this is so confusing 

I am so baffled people 

HELP!!!!!!