Sunday 6 September 2015

Sunday

Although it is my birthday tomorrow
We are celebrating today
I say celebrating
More like a small family dinner 
That's what I wanted 
Something informal and low key
A get together with my nearest and dearest
Tomorrow I'll be 34
It's a big deal for me to even admit to that
For the first couple of years writing this blog
I avoided telling anyone my age
Because I felt ashamed
Ashamed that I was a woman in my thirties 
And I had made such a mess of my life
Now?
Well now I'm proud of my age
I proud that I made it this far
Yes I have little to show for my life
I don't have a partner 
Or children
A job
Or my own house 
What I do have is my health
And peace of mind 
And that outweighs anything else

34 
Another year 
Usually I would be clocking up the years of my illness 
But now I am counting my years in recovery 
By rights 
I should be dear ten times over
In the meetings 
They say people in recovery are hand picked 
I don't know if that's true 
But it's a nice thought

Anyway 
I'll post pictures of said dinner later on
Have a good Sunday.....

14 comments:

  1. Your health is something so much more precious. It is the greatest gift of life. Everything else a house partner kids qualifications yeah they're nice but a lot of the time they're over rated there's still plenty of time for all that dear enjoy many birthday wishes your way xx

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  2. You may not have 2.4 kids and a white picket fence, but you have your dogs ("My kids have fur and feathers," I tell people), you have an amazing family that has grown in strength through your addictions instead of falling apart and away from each other. You have, in many many ways, conquered your demons, even if you have to keep an effort to stay one step ahead of them. There are so many things for you to be proud of, and so much you can still experience.

    Here's to finding ourselves in our 30s, Ruby.

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  3. *Almost forgot to include, you also have an amazing network of friends and counselors who want you to be able to keep growing, but still love you for exactly the person you are.

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    Replies
    1. Yes!!
      I love that Tempest!!
      Here's to doing it in our thirties!! X

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  4. I love this post. Thank you so much. xx
    (aged slightly older than you!)

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  5. have a lovely birthday dinner,34 is a great age to be! hope this year brings you everything you dream of xx jo

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    Replies
    1. Thank you so much Jo Jo
      I hope 34 is the best yet..... X

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  6. Happy birthday for tomorrow lovely :) hope it's a good one!

    And yes, health and sanity are very good things to have, and far outweigh anything else.

    Xxx

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  7. I think you are much much more than many in their 40s 50s and 60s


    Age doesn't mean wisdom and most people just lucked their way into present circumstances, even though they will tell it differently.

    Xoxo Shelby

    PS I'm not young either and I had a horrible mess of my teens and 20s.
    I believe that will just make us wiser, better people. If you haven't made mistakes, you probably haven't done anything!

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    Replies
    1. (That is not to say it is fun to admit though.)

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    2. I should say I'm 29 so not that different. And a lot can happen in a year.

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  8. happy birthday, my little cupcake (should be your birthday now that i'm typing this).

    "Well now I'm proud of my age
    I proud that I made it this far
    Yes I have little to show for my life"

    i am proud of you too. you had so much to go through and you've gone through it all. you have made a lot of yourself too, and in the future, as you recover, you'll just make more and more. i think that Shelby's right.



    -Sam Lupin

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Thank you for leaving some love x